The Transition into Motherhood
Wow, wow, wow… I’m officially a mother now.
I’m filled with so much joy and I am very proud of myself. This year was full of a lot of highs and lows, but I persevered no matter what the odds were. However, no one can prepare you for motherhood. I’ve learned that this is a journey, not a race. I’ve learned that there are things that I have to change about myself in order to be the best mother that I can be to my daughter, Nala.
A few things that I am working on are my priorities, time management, spending/saving habits, and self-care. The goal is to make progress daily, not perfection. There have been times where I was hard on myself, but I having been consistently giving myself grace and time.
As far as my priorities, they’ve changed since I became a mother. Prior to becoming a mother, my only responsibility I had was for myself. I would do absolutely anything to make myself happy and I attained every single goal that I had (besides a trip to Europe), before I had Nala. I’m so serious, everythinggg that I wanted… Everything that I dreamt of, I got it. I wanted to move to California, I did it. I wanted to become a Registered Nurse, I did it. I wanted to go to Coachella, I did it. I wanted to travel alone, I did it. I wanted to meet SZA and other celebrities, I did it. I wanted to grow my Instagram platform… I DID IT. I wanted to have my own business… I DID IT. How could I not be grateful? Now the things that I’d like to accomplish are centered around my daughter, and the things that were once important to me are no longer my main focus. God and Nala are my top priorities. I am no longer living just for myself, I have a daughter who needs me. Since I found out I was pregnant, my focus gradually started changing, and it still is! I was told that it takes some time to understand the new role that you’re in. I gave birth to Nala, but I also gave birth to my new self, so I have to take time to get to know “her”. I’m raising Nala, but I’m also raising me.
My time management is another change that I’m making. Getting things done throughout the day and being as productive as possible is something that I’d like to work on. Since Nala is still a newborn, she spends a lot of the day sleeping, so that gives me time to get things done around my home and work on myself (journaling, self-care etc.). Howeverrr, it’s very easy to take that time to binge watch my favorite shows and watch the day go by. It’s definitely something that I’m working on.
Before I became a mother my spending habits weren’t the best. I struggled with living beyond my means, and I loved luxurious things. I feel like I’m tending to my inner child now and I enjoy the simplicity of life. I have always been simple/low maintenance, but as I started to make more money as a nurse, the more I wanted to spend and buy things that I truly didn’t need. It’s hard to be a parent when you’re not in the best place financially, so it’s important for me to prioritize building healthy budgeting habits.
Lastly, I’ve noticed that it’s so easy to fall off your self-care routine when you become a mother. You’re so focused on providing for someone else that you forget to tend to your own needs. That being said, I’ve been trying to spend some time alone and do things that make me happy like exercising, face masks, going to coffee shops, spas, classes, yoga, and therapy. I just started to make this change this week so I look forward to the results that come from tending to myself again.
Oooof that was a lot. Like I said before the goal is progress not perfection. I’m changing, but it doesn’t mean that I’m perfect. I am trying my hardest every day to be the best version of myself not only for my daughter, but also myself.
Once again,
I’m raising her, but I’m also raising me.